We have all heard horror stories about divorces that resembled World War III. These divorces may have ended in bankruptcy, parental alienation, a destroyed reputation, debt, and a host of other negative consequences. If you were a child of divorce, you may have lived it. But alas, not all divorces end this way, and certainly not yours.
If the thought of your divorce having a bad ending strikes fear in your heart, we have advice we’d like to pass along. After representing countless clients from all different marriage scenarios and backgrounds, we have observed some commonalities, namely in what makes a “good divorce” and what makes a “bad divorce.” If you’d like to have one of those good divorces, this may be the best divorce advice you come across.
How to Have a Good Divorce
If you truly want to have a good divorce, the most important thing you can do is treat your soon-to-be-ex with respect and dignity from here on out. We understand you may have a lot of differences. He or she may have even cheated on you, or maxed out all the credit cards and put you in a lot of debt. They may even have a substance abuse problem.
No matter how much he or she may have caused you heartache, it’s important to manage your emotions throughout the divorce process, and if you have children together, you must do so permanently because your spouse will be in your life for a very long time, especially if you end up having grandkids.
The single biggest factor in positive divorces is the spouses set their differences aside and treat each other with dignity and respect. You have to look at your divorce as a business transaction because, in reality, that’s what it is. It’s really about dividing the marital property and debts more than anything.
Divorces fueled by jealousy, spite, anger, rage, and resentment usually lead to poor outcomes. A contested divorce can quickly lead to increased legal fees, which in turn drains the marital estate. The best insurance spouses have against a negative outcome is to collaborate with each other until a fair divorce settlement is reached.